Resigned to Fate
I penned an essay recently (and discovered that it takes no less than three hours for me to write an essay to my own qualifications) and, though I decline to share most of its contents, I think its concluding remarks summarize completely enough my general philosophy on living that it has merited publication on my personal blog.
I must note that my PERSONAL views on this subject are quite divorced from my POLITICAL views on the great question of Free Will and Determinism. Anyone taking from this that I believe human agency to be powerless, or the forces of nature or God to be entirely supreme, and the will of Man a mere illusion, could not be more wrong about my understanding. But that is another essay.
The substance of my worries, then… ought to be clear to anyone with the most rudimentary understanding of the human heart. I fear to lose [the world;] I fear to lose myself; but most, complex fatalist that I am, I fear to cause things to go contrary to the way they were “meant to go.” I have utmost faith that Providence will put people in the places they are meant to be in, regardless of whether those people think it is good for them or not; and that those people, by wise reflection and humility, can eventually discern the meanings and purposes behind their fates, once they have accepted them. “Everything happens for a reason,” and “The Lord works in mysterious ways.” Though I might not actually alter the course of my fate, I might very well degrade my understanding of it by cutting against the grain and resisting the natural way of things.
Thus, while I might in a passionate moment hope… and in a reasonable moment consider… in a realistic moment I must only acknowledge that fate is far more fickle than my own particular desires and reason[ing]s, and that one day I will look back upon this chapter of my life, accepting it completely , knowing its beginning and end, and understanding [fully] its place in the broader tapestry [that is] the story of my life. If experience is any guide, an odyssey of pain and pleasure, victory and defeat, lies between me as I pen these lines, and me in that future moment. I pray only that God will give me the wisdom, goodness, and strength necessary to navigate it all, vigilantly keeping and becoming the best possible version of myself as I progress upon the journey.